Reminders and Gifts

I do not know what I have deserved

 these past two weeks

but I am Thankful!

The weekend that included the 8, 9, 10 of Feb.

was full of fun, learning and laughter!

We got the pleasure to have Toby stay with us.

He is one amazing little boy!

He was adopted from the Ukraine 2 years ago.

He has blonde hair, a great sense humor and downs.

We are the lucky people who get to enjoy Toby when his parents 

need some assistance with being in two places at once, haha

I do know that I am so grateful for that allowance.

Toby was a blessing and a reminder.

A reminder of how innocent and trusting a child can be.

A reminder of a love that is not common to this world.

A reminder of how a simple meal can turn into a learning moment.

A reminder that life is short and we should be using our 

strengths and talents to reflect the 

Love 

Joy

Patience

Determination

Forgiving

Nature of my God.

He knew what he was doing when he made these angels.

He knew that we " A typical children" would need a reminder

of the very qualities that make my God just that My father.

He knew that we would need to be reminded to listen 

to love without looking at the outside

to laugh even when we fall

to never give up on our dreams

to smile and focus on the life that we are giving

not to focus on what we do not have or think that we deserve.

I want to Thank God for knowing more than I do and allowing me 

to learn and grow from all the lessons I am part of.

That weekend ended with a surprise shower for the Cole family 

who just brought home their little girls, Bella and Gracie!

I am so blessed to be apart of this very awesome and amazing support

group in the Kearney area.  

So Thank you Kiffany, Beth, Deanna, Jody D, Suzanna, Jera,

Gracie, Bella, Angelica, Toby,  Gracie, Hunter

for allowing me the life changing opportunity to be apart of your group

even while we are waiting for our son!

I have already learned so much from you all!

I want to learn more.

Thank you for all your lessons and taking on this "A typical child"

 

I am in awe of these families and feel so blessed to be apart of them!

I do know that Thank You is not enough so listen to my heart!

 

The next reminder I had was yesterday.

Minden was the lucky town to host the Special Olympics basketball event.

I truly love those days!

To get the chance to see these kiddos play and just love the sport 

is a teachable moment that I enjoy every time I see it!

I was reminded that I am given what I need.

 I am to focus on the prize at the end of the race.

I was reminded of how inspirational it is to 

see determination and courage 

cross the cognitive lines 

that bind people to the lies of 

"Survival of the fittest"!

I was in tears to see all the athletics  doing there best

win or lose 

 all showed sportsmanship!

Thank you to all who supports, helps, and encourages 

these athletics to achieve their dreams!

The self worth, pride and courage is priceless and 

I know that all of them

are thankful for the time you give.

I want you all to know that the investment

 you make will not 

return void!!!!

I am so thankful for the lessons, reminders and the gifts

I receive on a daily basis.

These gifts help me to dream of a time when our son can 

come home and take part in this 

amazing life!

I can take courage 

I can have my faith increased

I can  choose not to give up

I can dare to dream

 I can believe in a happy ending

BECAUSE 

of all the reminders and gifts that I am given

THANK YOU

THANK YOU
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!

 

Missing him! Loving him!

I miss his smile.

I miss his cute little nose.

I love his cute little laugh!

I miss his hugs and loves.

I miss the way he holds unto my fingers.

I miss the way he looks at me.

I miss the way he walks across the room.

I miss the way his eyebrows go up when he is curious.

 

Sometimes when I think of him I smile.

Other times I cry.

Tears of happiness and then tears of sadness.

Tears of happiness because I got to hold him

I got to kiss him and sing songs in his ears. 

I got to be a part of his life.

Tears of sadness because 

I can't hold him right now.

I can't kiss him.

I can't read a book to him before bed.

I wonder how he is feeling.

I wonder what he is doing?

I wonder if he is o.k. and taken care of!

I cry tears for the unknown.

      

I do know that my body and heart aches sometimes.

I can not control it, there will be something 

that triggers a memory, then I will either laugh or cry.

 

I know that all I can do now

 is 

wait and wait and wait.

All this time gives me time to think.

Thinking of many things.

Some things are memories.

Some things are dreams.

The memories are the anchors of my soul.

I remember the cute things he did.

I remember how it felt to see him for the first. 

My dreams are the love that focuses me!

I dream of all the time when he calls me momma.

I dream of the first time we take him to the zoo.

I dream of the first time he will wake up in his own room.  

I do know that it does not matter what 

the calendar 

or

the clock

says

My heart has always loved him 

and it always will.

Even for a thousand years!