Words can and should turn into actions!

In my life I have generally been the cheerleader,

I tend to think positively.

I am a sucker for happy endings.

I also tend to believe that there is good in every one.

I tend to say

" hang in there, help is on the way".

"It is only a season nothing last forever!"

"Always leave your loved ones with kind words"

"He who angers you controls you."

"Every  thing happens for a reason!"

Even when I say

"I love you or care about you!"

 

It is pretty different living out these words.

It is easy to say things but to actually believe it 

and live it, is a harder task

I have learned to be careful what I ask for.

I ask for patience and I am waiting and waiting!

I want to be more loving and kind 

and I find myself with an inner conflict.

Even when I am tired and I do not feel like giving more

I try to do what is Right.

It is sometimes hard to live the words that are to 

encourage, give peace, and show affection.

It is hard but not impossible.

I know that everything does happen for a reason.

 I also know that I do not need to know why.

It is hard to live out the words that I believe .

That is why I have friends and family to remind me.

Remind me of what the little things are 

all about!

I will make sure that I am careful to be true

to what I say.

I still know that everything is going to be alright!

In the end it will be o.k.

and if it is not o.k.

then it is not the end!

I do know that it will be alright !

Birthdays a time for celebration!

 

 

 

 

 

June is here!!!

It is the sixth month of the 2013 year.

In looking back it has appeared to me that

this year has had a dual affect.

Some days and minutes it seems way too fast.

 Some days and minutes it seems to be way to slow!

It is June and summer school starts Monday.  

I am filled with bitter sweet feelings and thoughts. 

I had planned on not doing this year and taking some time off.

I planned on bonding with my son.

I had planned on many fun and exciting adventures 

for my kiddos.  

I had planned on teaching Artem about the 

awesomeness of the zoo.

I know  for a fact my Kersten and Kelsee 

would love to show him their favorite sight 

at the zoo. 

We would have fun in the swimming pool and 

eating ice cream and just enjoying the 

summer day, as it ends with the light show from the 

lightening bugs.

 

 

 

There would be a grand celebration on June the 4th.

This the day in which this earth was graced with Artem's birth.

I love birthdays!   

These days are the days in which I take some time to reflect.

I am so thankful that Artem was born.  

I am so thankful for the time we got to spend with him.

I am missing his smile and his laugh

 as he was ready to run into my arms!

I had planned on his birthday being with us as he turned 7.

I wanted to give him a birthday party

full of laughter, smiles and a family

that loves him.

I wanted him to know we are so thankful 

he was born on June 4th 2006.

I thank his mom for choosing his life over her

needs and dreams, Thank you!

I am sure that was not a easy decision,

but it was a self less decision.

It also hit me that we will not be 

with Kersten on her 18th birthday this year.

She will already be at college.

Our time with Kel Kel is also limited.

So it starts!!

I know that physically I can not be with 

my babies on the actual

day in which I was blessed with the privilege 

of being their momma, however,

My love, support and pride will be felt in their hearts!   

Even though I can not be with my kiddos, 

the space does not change how I feel about them.

It does not change how I am a better mom

because of them.

It does not change the fact that I love them.

It does not change the fact that every year after

their birth, I will remember the moment 

my life was changed becausee of them.

Happy birthday my son Artem...

Thank you for allowing me to love you!